23rd
Finally I’ve met my 23rd year watching this colourful world…Well…So many things I’ve passed. Waw…I couldn’t even paint them in couple of words. Coz juz like what I’ve said, they were juz happening on my past. I’ve passed them, I’ve left them, and no need to get them back (though I really wish to get them back sometimes)…
So now…What will I set from this moment on…??? That’s a very good question…So hard to answer it. I need much more time to think before I could give a brief final answer. But I’ve pointed out some lines that, maybe, I should pay so much more attention to it.
Firstable, I still lack of sense of grateful to anything I’ve got, achieved, gained, or had. Well…If I want to say an excuse that I’m only a human that never meets that word : satisfied, it could be. Very makes sense. But when will I start to realize that I can’t have everything…??? Life’s a choice, and I can’t have them all…The only thing I can do is juz to thank God for blessing me these much…Yeah…Maybe that would be my very first point in my have-to-do-list…Start from now on…And no excuse, please…!!!
The second point is, I still have an obligation to learn. Learn everything. So much lessons out there that haven’t catched by my naked heart and brain. Well…I think I have to thank God for blessing me these very “rich” surroundings to learn so far…I’d never be like what I am today if I was not there…
The third one, it’s all bout maintaining my relationships with others. I know I’ve got a problem with ego and others’ appreciation. I juz want everything to be respected as it does, I want everything to be appreciated as it has to be, that’s it. Unfortunately, my point of view doesn’t meet others’ want mostly.
Well…I think I have to learn to compromise from now on if I don’t wanna lose some more friends, hihihi…
Okay…then what’s next…??? To be a real woman…??? Hmm…It totally depends on you how to describe this “real woman”, but I think I have to start to think bout this issue. I don’t cook, I don’t sew, I don’t do anything that another woman can do. So what the heck am I…?!! Actually I never meant to ignore my essence of being a woman. In fact that I’m trully happy born as a female. It’s juz…maybe I haven’t found the willingness itself yet…Yeah…Something has to come up first to inspire me…Hehehe…But let’s see…I’m quite sure that someday I could be that “real woman”…
Hhh…that’s it…Enough for these bullshits of the day…My fingers have been tired and my brain have been dried…I’ll see you later in another theme, k…??? Oh, I forgot something important…Thanks God… ~.^